Hold on to your happy!

My birthday is at the beginning of June and I celebrate the entire month. I am notorious for keeping my decorations up for an entire month – especially my cards. Why, you may ask? It’s simple, because looking at my cards makes me happy. And displaying them for an entire month (and sometimes beyond) helps me to hold on to my happy! I feel a sense of jubilation when I open the envelope and read the printed or handwritten words on my cards that express the unique range of human emotions from faith, joy, humor and love. So walking by the cards each day after my birthday helps me to recall that moment and hold on to my happy!

One year, I even broke the rules and kept my fully decorated Christmas tree up until February because it made me happy. No, I wasn’t having an emotional melt-down. I was holding on to my happy!

There is a clear distinction between gratitude and holding on to your happy. We live in a world that forces us to rush through life, especially the joy-filled moments that are meant to be savored.

I am encouraging you to savor each enjoyable experience, feeling or person. Resist the urge to move onto the next thing in the midst of your “right now” thing! It really means staying in the present moment without time traveling to the future. This is what it means to hold on to your happy!

The test of my happy!

Holding onto my happy was a test for me this week. Last week was wonderful! I ran my first 5K Bubble Run with my best friend (read my Just do the thing! post for details); attended two energizing community meetings; and felt a sense of long-awaited, social normalcy that I haven’t experienced in the past two years. I know that you can feel the imminent “until” looming. It was all kicks and giggles until I tested positive for COVID then my happy came to a screeching halt!

This post is not going to be about COVID because it’s a sensitive issue for all of us, especially those who have lost loved ones or who are still experiencing lingering effects. I give you my sincerest empathy and respect. However, I will say that even a “mild” case in a person who is fully vexed and boosted is no laughing matter. And while I was on the phone with my doctor’s office, I received shocking news about a loved one. I caved in and cried when the impact of the news and my COVID results hit me. My tears represented frustration, worry and anger. The triplets of the worst emotions that anyone’s spirit can parent at one time.

However, I appreciated my tears because they allowed me to release. They cleansed my soul from emotions that can’t co-exist with my resolve to hold on to my happy. And c’mon y’all, I was raised by a strong, black woman with muscles built from overcoming adversity and an unwavering faith in God. So my tears of triplets were not welcome for permanent residence

5 Senses of Happiness

Hold onto the blissful moments in life with all 5 senses. These moments will be part your armor when battling the forces of discouragement and depression. I think back to the feeling of a cool island breeze on my cheek; the sound of blowing palm trees in the wind; and the smell of a plumeria flower when we visited Hawaii. Or the intricate flavors of vanilla and butter of a freshly baked, homemade cookies. The moment of cheerful anticipation when I’m at a graduation and “Pomp and Circumstance” plays during the parade of graduates. It’s like playing a con game on your mind. People say it all of the time, but life may truly change in the blink of an eye. So we much truly cherish the moments that we are in a state of contentment.

One of my favorite movies is “The Sound of Music”. I watch it every time that it comes on television. It represents a happy time in my childhood. My Mom, brother and I would watch it, dance and sing the songs. It was pure childhood joy! And then there’s my favorite song, “My Favorite Things”. Sound silly? Julie Andrews is encouraging us to “find the happy” in common moments and hold on to them!

Self-care

Hold on to my happy is recognizing when I’m in the midst of a memory-making moment and tucking away small pieces to enjoy later. And if I may speak honestly, holding onto my happy is another form of self-care. I’ve often wondered why it is so easy for our brains to default to traumas rather than pleasurable moments. Perhaps we need to override our minds with the good stuff so that the bad stuff can’t stick? I know that it sounds simplistic, but think about the preservation of our peace if it worked?

It was challenging being sick and in isolation all week. My spirit felt the tugs of discouragement and loneliness even though my husband was in the other room. I wanted to rush the healing process along to break out of this room and return to my normal. Shifting my mind to gratitude allowed me to fight off the doldrums and spirit tugs and created space for me to discover new moments of happiness in the midst of solitude.

Finding new happy!

I found new moments to savor, like the sound of the birds chirping throughout the day. I’m usually too busy to enjoy their sweet conversations with each other when I work from home. Binge watching season 2 of P-Valley with all of its twists and turns without interruption was definitely a happy moment. Yes, I am a fan – no judgement! I’m usually doing housework or never allow myself to sit for that long to watch back-to-back episodes of anything. I even enjoyed the soothing, cool breeze from the air-conditioning flowing across my face.

It even amused me that my husband and I were acting teenagers with all of the texts and phone calls to communicate. This week took me back to sweet moments in our courtship when I received “Good morning, Sunshine” and “good night, Babe” texts. I remembered the excitement that I felt 6 years ago.

But I didn’t stop there, I looked at old pictures of my Dad with his smiling eyes – so much happy to hold on to! The sound of his high-pitched laugh and smell of his manly cologne. His love of plaid and vibrant colored clothes. Heaven is enjoying him now, but my mind still holds on to the happy of the time that we spent together on Earth.

I’ve just proven my own point. It is possible to flood your braid with good stuff so that the bad stuff doesn’t stick. So my sistas, don’t rush through your happy in the fleeting moment when it arrives. Hold on to it with everything. Hold on to YOUR happy!